5 Common Mealtime Mistakes (and How to Gently Turn Them Around
Let’s be honest: feeding kids is hard.
You spend time planning meals, making food, maybe even cutting things into fun shapes… only for it to end up on the floor or met with a firm “NO!” before it even touches the plate.
Sound familiar?
If you’re stuck in a loop of mealtime meltdowns and feel like you’re getting it wrong — you’re not. These bumps are totally normal. And the good news? With a few gentle shifts, mealtimes can feel a whole lot calmer (and less like a war zone).
Here are five of the most common — and totally understandable — mistakes I see parents make around food… and what you can do instead.
1. Bribing with dessert 🍩
“Three more bites and you can have pudding.”
We’ve all said it. It feels like a quick win — and sometimes it does work — but here’s the catch: it teaches kids that the main meal is something to “get through” to earn the good stuff.
Over time, this can make vegetables feel like a punishment and dessert feel like a reward — rather than all foods being equal parts of a balanced diet.
Try this instead:
Serve dessert as part of the meal occasionally (yes, even on the plate at the same time!). This takes away the power struggle and helps your child learn to self-regulate their intake, without feeling like they have to “earn” the food they love.
2. Catering to every whim 🍞🧀🍕
“You don’t want this? Okay… toast it is.”
This is what I call the short-order chef trap. It comes from a place of love and wanting your child to eat something — but it can also teach them that if they refuse a meal, something better will come.
Try this instead:
Offer one “safe food” your child usually accepts alongside new or less familiar options. That way, there’s always something they can eat — but you’re not creating a separate meal. Boundaries with kindness is the goal here.
3. Giving up on new foods too soon 🥦
“They didn’t like broccoli last time, so I don’t bother anymore.”
Totally understandable — it’s disheartening when your efforts are rejected! But most kids need 10–20 exposures (or more!) to a new food before they’ll try or accept it.
Try this instead:
Keep serving small portions of the food without pressure. Let them explore it on their own terms — touching, smelling, even licking counts as progress.
4. Expecting dinner-table perfection 🍽️
We get told that mealtimes should be calm, joyful, and full of vegetables. Meanwhile, your child is throwing peas and trying to climb off their chair.
Try this instead:
Ditch the “ideal” mealtime image. Instead, focus on connection. Even five minutes of sitting together, chatting, and sharing a meal (however messy!) builds lifelong habits and food trust.
Progress looks different every day — and that’s okay.
5. Eating separately from your child 👨👩👧
This one is so common, especially in busy households: the adults eat later, the kids eat early. But children learn by watching — and they need to see you eating and enjoying a variety of foods.
Try this instead:
Join them for part of the meal when you can. Even if it’s just a snack or a cuppa while they eat, that shared time matters more than you think.
💛 Final Thoughts
You’re not failing. You’re not doing it wrong.
These are all completely natural patterns to fall into — especially when you’re tired, juggling a million things, and just want them to eat something.
But with a few small tweaks, mealtimes can shift from stressful to (mostly) smooth.
At Nanny Cooks, we support parents with real-life feeding strategies — grounded in paediatric expertise and delivered with empathy. Whether you’re deep in the fussy eating trenches or just looking to set up healthy habits early on, I’m here to help.
✨ You bring the love. I’ll bring the support.
All the best and happy eating,
Holly x
